Baseball Preview 2021 and Happy Easter

 

Since this is being posted before Easter, I thought I’d put in a couple of seasonal cards I received.  One’s from a nice co-worker.  She left me a pink sack with a Cherry Coke and some candy.  The other is a charity solicitation, but looks good.

 

I probably should have posted a baseball preview before the season started, but I kept waiting to find the Sports Illustrated preview issue.  I didn’t find one before I wrote this.  Looking back through my previous preview posts, I realize that this is an annual problem I keep having.  In any case, I turned down the other three baseball preview magazines because they weren’t up to date with the latest rosters, which is why I wait for the SI one.  Instead (after three trips to Barnes & Noble), I picked up a Manga art magazine.  I don’t do manga art, but there were a couple of articles in it by Ilya Kuvshinov, one of my favorite artists.  However, it was $20.  I also question this purchase, but hopefully it’ll be good when I read through it. 

 

I’m waiting to see if some Opening Day (OD) baseball comes on the radio while I write this.  I’ve checked out a few low-attendance Spring Training games on the MLB Network in March.  For whatever reason, they weren’t even playing complete games this March, but that didn’t prevent an injury to Eloy Jimenez, perhaps wrecking the White Sox’s chances this year.  The Stadium Network started a new show called Inside Baseball.  It’s just some talking heads and some random baseball topics, but I’ve enjoyed it.

 

Not to be outdone, ESPN Radio was talking OD baseball.  Of course, it was a sponsored segment.  The only way the network would talk baseball would be if somebody was paying them to.  The only reason I was listening was because I was trying to find a game.  (Local sportstalk had promised a game today, but declined to give the time.)  Unfortunately, the commentary was the usual “baseball is boring” and everything associated with their marketing is wrong.  The first thing MLB needs to do to market itself better is to rip all baseball coverage away from ESPN. 

 

Let’s get into the issues for this season.  How will rule and playoff changes effect the game?  I don’t know.  Specifically, I’m not sure what those changes are.  They left all that up in the air during Spring Training.  I don’t know what they decided on.  I kept waiting for a story on the MLB website to pop up detailing any changes, but it never happened.  The universal DH is apparently out.  This brings up a future issue.  The Player’s Union and MLB both want the DH and can’t agree to do it.  If they can’t agree to do something they both want, there’s little hope for a new CBA after this season without a strike/lockout.  This action will probably destroy baseball.  ESPN will be so pleased.  The union and the owners will concur as they finally finish off their suicide death pact.  Everybody’s happy.

 

Unfortunately, there’s only going to be two salient issues this season: social justice and the cold.  The reason sports was allowed to come back was to promote the cold.  Justin Turner’s dramatic and unnecessary expulsion from the last game of the World Series last season was proof enough of that.  This season starts with five players on the Nationals testing positive for OD after a month of no reported positives.  This isn’t suspicious at all.  The sport will also be used to promote the killshot extensively, which will solve all cold problems, but will still require everyone to wear masks forever.

 

Social justice promotion may be the true bane of the sport though.  There’s already demands that the All-Star Game be taken away from Atlanta, because Georgia wants to pass some election reforms.  This is racist of course.  Voters should never have to show an ID to vote, though the killshot passport will be required enter a Wal-Mart to buy food.  As we await the inevitable riots after the George Floyd trial, this will be the impetus for extensive virtue signaling by MLB.  The ASG will be cancelled rather than moved.  All the players will wear 42 for the rest of the season.  The Indians will immediately change their name to the Cleveland Baseball team.  (I have a multitude of unprintable suggestions.)  There will be a black anthem played before the knee-taking Anthem.  What few fans are allowed to attend must also bend the knee or be ejected. 

 

With all that happiness to look forward to, let’s get to my picks. 

 

In the AL, it will be the A’s winning the West with the Astros in as a Wild Card.  The A’s will somehow scrap together a better team.  The Astros will have enough talent to get into the playoffs, but will have too many holes in their roster.  The White Sox will win the Central even without Jimenez.  The Indians won’t have enough offense to compete and will be suffering under too much existential angst over the impending name change.  (“What if we’re renamed something ridiculous, like the Chihuahuas?”)  The Yankees will buy . . .  err . . . win the East, but will require a couple of high-priced trade deadline acquisitions to do it.  The Blue Jays get the other Wild Card.

 

In the NL, it’s the F-ing Dodgers in the West, duh.  The Padres will get a Wild Card spot, but Fernando Tatis Jr. will have two stints on the IR and not be much of a factor.  The Cardinals take the Central with new third baseman Nolan Arenado leading the way.  Or more likely, he plays like the bag of chips the Rockies got in return for the trade, but the rest of the division is so bad that the Cardinals can win it playing .500 ball.  The Braves win the East, irritated about the whole ASG thing.  The Nationals rebound with great pitching and Juan Soto to get the other Wild Card.  (I feel like the Mets will be good too, but they don’t make it in unless the playoffs are expanded.)

 

So who wins?  Nobody.  A strike ends the season right before the playoffs.  Don’t worry.  Football will be on by that time.  Nobody will care.  I’m tempted to stick to this prediction, but I have a yearly obligation to pick a winner (and be wrong). 

 

If they’d played a full regular season last year, I’d say the Dodgers would have no chance of repeating, but since they didn’t they’ve got a shot.  However, their new ace, Trevor Bauer, reminds me too much of Zack Grienke.  He wins games for himself, but doesn’t win championships for his team.  For that matter, Mookie Betts only cares about posing over home plate when he scores.  Even if he’s given the MVP award this season to appease the social justice crowd, he only really values marketing himself.  If only Tatis could stay healthy, the Padres would make it to the World Series, but that isn’t happening.  It’ll be the Braves for the NL.

 

The Yankees will somehow fail to make to the World Series.  A plague of injuries will hobble them no matter how many star players they have (probably including Trevor Story traded from the Rockies, who needed a jar of salsa to go with their chips).  Their team is just too injury prone.  If the rest of the White Sox roster stays healthy, they’re in.  (If not, the Blue Jays surprise everyone.) 

 

So, it’s racist Atlanta versus Chicago, home of the human shooting gallery.  Thank goodness for strict Illinois gun laws, otherwise it might be really dangerous there.  Probably nobody’s going to watch this matchup, so it’s okay that the strike cancels it.  (Why am I bothering to make dumb predictions if they aren’t even sexy?)  The Braves win it on experience more than talent.  There you have it.  Who cares?